It could be a complete thought.

Let me start with this: I’m beginning to miss high school.
STOP! Before you go straight to the comment section and tell me how stupid or immature I am listen to my thoughts before you make an assumption about me.
I was watching a soccer game the other day, at Capital- the senior game. The game was devoted to seniors, to thank them for their hard work and everything related to the sort. Watching them, and listening to the other students in the stands I began to lament:

High school was simple back then; there was nothing to worry about. I had school, church and that was it. Looking at these kids, they are here and no where else, college hasn’t hit them; reality hasn’t struck a chord in their hearts. I am here on this bench worried about all these things, and these kids are playing their hearts out because that’s all they have right now: soccer. And everything I have is worry and anxiety, and a little bit of love.

On that bench with the cold affecting my hands, I realized I wanted to go back. Back to high school and everything simple, everything easy. But, logically that’s impossible. If I did go back, I wouldn’t be where I am today, that’s why it is self reflection. I was reflecting on my past, everything I have learned would be lost. Unless I wanted to keep everything, but why would I want that? To achieve greatness. A selfish desire that has little practicality in real life. Here I am, wanting to be back in high school, in a simpler life, doing the easy thing.
You want to ask it don’t you? Why do you want the easy things in life?
So I am not responsible for the hard things! If I am not responsible for the hard things in life I am indifferent to them- and I’m okay with that. I have a manager that says all he wants to do is nothing. Nothing at all. He wants to sit. To lie in his bed and stare at the ceiling- he wants this life. It doesn’t sound too difficult, to do nothing, not to be responsible for anything But also sounds too easy, so now I am torn. I want the easy things, but also a little challenge.
Sartre would call me an Inauthentic Individual, a person that can’t make up his mind, one that uses his freedom for granted.
Where I am? I am inauthentic individual that can’t decide what I want in life, or how to live it. Can this be anymore ridiculous? Yes, it could, it always can.